Death is one of the intriguing topics for me because it has challenged me from that of a fighter to one of that of weak to back to a fighter.I would like to explain in this fashion , for a cheetah to jump high it has to step one step back so did I. In 2011 I was diagnosed with Schizophrenia. But I didn’t lose heart until one day I reached at Mata Amritanandmayi Devi ‘s ashram. I was thinking how I would eek out a living when my job I was doing although paid okay but I was not doing well at work and personally , so I had to put a brave heart for 3 months. After my contract was over I went to Amma and listened some angry gestures but I knew Amma won’t disappoint me because I had faith in my Guru. So thus began my journey of pursuit of happiness not the movie but the real pursuit.
At this juncture I kept motivation level little high though I was distorted with constant hallucinations and Amma entrusted me in the form of an online lab tutorship. I did exceptionally well and could get my name in newspapers and other accolades. Meanwhile I kept harping on God , Self realization , Srimad Bhagwad Gita and I found solace in contemplation of both my duty and my household chores meanwhile listening to satsangs. But the major turn came when I joined AT(Amrita Technologies). I was doing what I was passionate about that is python, which I had picked up on my own although I still keep working hard but the passion never dies. And so also my sadhna which is nothing but Spiritual practices. I tried my best to hold on to Amma and thus I reaped best harvest by Amma herself allowing me to switch jobs and get paid sufficiently well and taken care of all my needs for all the hard work I had done. But at the same time like my Guru Amma says timing is also the third factor which was perfect for me and so now I have improved in my death like dull situation in schizophrenia to a healthy and mostly recovered situation except minor hallucinations. A commendable work has gone with my parents, brother , friends , and all near and dear ones asking me to go full throttle on python and set the goals high. I never knew I had so much patience and self control that I could harvest the benefits of a silent spectator to my Guru in mid 30s.
At the end I would like to talk about my work as a software developer at Amrita Technologies. As I see 16 months back I have come a long way in terms of understanding and picking up any challenge in software. In the initial phase I faced a tough and ironically not so kind boss towards my health considering Amma’s compassion but I didn’t bother and ignored it . Truly that paved way for me to continue my passion in python when I met the best boss so far in my 8 years of academic + software & hardware career. He was very compassionate towards my disorder and so also my smartness was well received by him. Now I have regained my confidence and would go on to do java , streamsets , Django say whatever and bingo I am there on the top. This is because of my Guru Amma so in a nutshell I would like to pay my gratitude towards all those who had trusted in my lowest ebb but as they call me ‘chandu the Dravidian wall’ equivalent to Rahul Dravid the Indian cricket the Wall , so also I am back with a bigger bonanza of hard work. So my topic was on schizophrenia and how I dealt with it , that’s how death like thing changed that from one of morose to superb situation. Thanks for paying heed to my notes in this article. I am thoroughly obliged and wish all the very best to whomsoever going through depression as to not worry instead trust in GOD.